We are interrupting our regularly-scheduled review today to bring you the news that, if you have a Twitter account, you saw your feed explode with yesterday (and if you do have a Twitter account, why are you not following me?). Yes, Zayn Malik has decided to break the hearts of fourteen-year-old girls and gay men everywhere by leaving the band One Direction, and all jokes aside (and boy did the jokes come flying, particularly from those over 25), this is a bummer. One Direction wasn't The Beatles or quite frankly even the Spice Girls, but they are definitely the biggest band on the planet right now and I enjoyed a lot of their music. So in honor of this being the beginning of the end (we all saw what happened after Geri Halliwell adiosed herself from the Spice Girls), I figured I would rank the five members of the band, from most to least favorite:
5. Louis Tomlinson
Pro: Umm...he arguably has the best nose of the group? I'm kind of at a loss here...
Con: Louis is not the best singer in the group, and as Pewdiepie frequently quips, "no one cares about Louis." Louis is cute, but definitely not the cutest, and he's not the worst singer, but he never gets the lead. Also, he's ridiculously bad at handling the gay rumors that have surrounded him. I get that you don't like that people say you're gay when you say you aren't (I could insert a Lance Bass joke here, but I'll attempt the high road), but your reactions border on homophobia and that's really sad from a group that has done a lot to deter homophobia in a major way amongst its fanbase.
4. Niall Horan
Pro: He's definitely a charmer, and I'm a sucker for a blond with a cute accent. Also, my friend Abby loves him and I think she would have something to say if I put him in last.
Con: Again, he's not the best singer in the group, and I like my boy band members to be a bit edgier-without the tattoos and the like he's sort of the choir boy, the nice guy that parents encourage to be on the posters rather than one of the tattooed-to-the-hilt fellas, but I like the bad boys, what can I say?
3. Liam Payne
Pro: He's a good singer, frequently adding at least a verse to most songs and always being a major part of the chorus. He's one of the taller guys (I like taller guys), and has the smoldering eye thing down pretty clearly. Also, he's got a bit of that bad boy thing going on, but still with the "you-can-change-him-vibe" (don't give me that look-I know this is all marketing and shallow-I dissected electoral battles in the Senate this morning, what more do you want from me?).
Con: He's kind of moody seeming, and he's not particularly charming in interviews like Niall or Harry are.
2. Zayn Malik
Pro: I put this on my Tumblr, but Zayn is definitely the prettiest, and quite frankly the best singer (whenever there's a "high note" happening in a song, it's Zayn). Plus, he's got the bad boy/misunderstood artist thing going stone-cold.
Con: He broke up the band. He was Number One on this list on Monday.
1. Harry Styles
Pro: Pretty much everyone agrees that if there's a breakout/Justin Timberlake, it's Harry. He's got that ridiculously devilish-smile that is impossible to deny. Seriously-watch him charm the pants off of basically everyone that interviews (when Tyler Oakley interviewed the band the flirting was off-the-charts). Plus, he's a good singer and has the hair of a Greek poet.
Con: Isn't it kind of cliche to pick Harry as your favorite?
And there you have it-my compilation of my favorite members of the band. Who are your favorites? Share them in the comments!!!
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