But that's not what I'm going to write about, because it's not interesting. Chances are, statistically, that you've also struggled with your weight at some point in your life, and don't need a reminder of how delicious pasta is. Instead, I wanted to write about the people you encounter when you're on a diet. If you've ever been on a diet, the below six groups of people will be all too familiar.
1. The Pushers
The pushers are probably the worst people to have around you, especially at the beginning of a diet, particularly because they're almost always your friends or family. These are the people who insist that you break your diet because it's a "special occasion." They'll frequently say something like "can't you just make an exception-it's Kyle's birthday and it's really important to him."
First of all, Kyle did not make his cake (likely someone at the Cold Stone Creamery did, and they could care less if I ate it). Secondly, even if he did, he'll understand-I am on a diet. I don't want to eat the cake...because I desperately want to eat the cake. However, I know that the cake will turn into a pizza from Papa Murphy's after work. Which will turn into a pint of Cherry Garcia. Which will turn into two bowls of Fruit Brute for breakfast with a side of Toaster Strudel, and bing, bang, boom, my diet has added fifteen pounds to the scale.
Pushers usually are family members, if we're being honest, and not to be cruel, but they're usually some of your friends who also have had diet-fails in the past. The Psych major in me would point out that they don't want you to succeed where you fail, but that's a treatise for a different day. Whatever their reason, it's mean. If you know someone is on a diet, don't shove a cheesecake into their face with a guilt trip.
2. The Advice Givers
Right now you're thinking, "John, advice givers are trying to be helpful and well-intentioned, so why are you about to harp on them?" In some ways, you are right. Advice can be very worthwhile, especially if you aren't sure about your diet or where to go. Advice from a doctor or a nutritionist can also be extremely worthwhile, because they can help you with your weight loss.
But they're my nutritionist or doctor, and you are not. So if I decide to eat only 1200 calories a day for a while, I'm an adult, and can make that decision. If I decide to not mix up my diet very often, that's also my decision. It's not your thirteen-year-old child. I've had weight issues on-and-off for a decade. I know what is best for me, and at the very least, it's my decision.
3. The Deniers
"Oh, you don't need to lose weight; you look great!" This is one that we've all fallen into, including myself. Occasionally someone says they are dieting and are just fishing for a compliment (see our next item), but as a whole, most people don't go on diets unless they truly need to do it or want to change their body mass. This isn't a bad thing-eating healthier and wanting to exercise is a good thing. It's also a good thing to have a proper sense of yourself. Saying that I don't need to lose weight is just making me feel worse about myself-be encouraging, but don't lie.
4. The Skinny-Minis
A silly term, to be certain, but you know the type. The people who complain about either A) losing three pounds (the Regina Georges of the world) or B) who also complain about being overweight or fat or needing to exercise when they're already a Size 4. People on diets do not hate skinny people. They do hate skinny people, however, who pretend that they're fat to get reassurance from others that they don't need to lose any weight and in the process make you feel even worse.
5. The Diet Police
Listen-I've had oatmeal for breakfast for the past week, I've exercised after work every night despite being exhausted from working a 60-hour week. If I decide that it's time to have one measly Snickers, that's between me and my bathroom scale. It is not up to you to say "are you sure you want to eat that, it's a lot of calories?" I see this one a lot with things that aren't even a diet food. I might be running a bunch of errands, and I'll get the look for eating a handful of popcorn or a few pretzels. It's my diet, my rules. Unless I have specifically asked you to be my food enforcer, it isn't your place.
6. The Soul-Crushers
You know how, no matter how obvious it may be, you're never supposed to point out if a woman is pregnant until she's specifically told you? There's an inverse for someone on a diet-you should never assume that they are still on the diet, no matter if they look the way you think they should at the end of a diet or not. Some people are just hoping to get out of a specific weight danger zone or just want to fit into a pair of pants a size smaller. Not everyone is going to look like Taylor Lautner, so never, ever say "how much longer do you have?" to someone on a diet unless you know they're still working on it. Because getting that question after you've finally decided you've reached your goal weight is the perfect excuse to buy the Jumbo Cheetos.
And that is our Friday rant-for those of you who have been on a diet, which of these is your most annoying (for me it's the Pushers and Advice Givers, hence the multiple paragraphs since both cause me to overeat)? What am I missing? And anyone want to share some great dieting success stories? Inspirations are always welcome!
No comments:
Post a Comment