Beach Party (1963)

Film: Beach Party (1963)

Stars: Bob Cummings, Dorothy Malone, Frankie Avalon, Annette Funicello, Morey Amsterdam, Harvey Lembeck, Eva Six

Director: William Asher

Oscar History: No nominations

Snap Judgment Ranking: 4/5 stars

Each month, as part of our 2024 Saturdays with the Stars series, we are looking at the women who were once crowned as "America's Sweethearts" and the careers that inspired that title (and what happened when they eventually lost it to a new generation).  This month, our focus is on Annette Funicello: click here to learn more about Ms. Funicello (and why I picked her), and click here for other Saturdays with the Stars articles.

By 1963, Funicello was 21, and couldn't really get away with playing "little girl" roles anymore.  Walt Disney actually had an idea to put her in their movie Summer Magic (Funicello was still under contract to the studio), but she had already committed to make a different film instead, and that role went to Hayley Mills.  There were rumors of a rift between Disney and Funicello after Summer Magic, but the actress would go on to make two more (very successful) movies for the studio in the years that followed, so that seems to have been water-under-the-bridge.  Still, giving up Summer Magic ended up being a grand idea for Funicello, as the film she make instead would define her film career: Beach Party.  The movie, which spawned an entire decade's worth of spinoffs, spoofs, and sequels to the wildly-successful film, would become the signature role of Funicello's adult career.  It was also a much saucier role than she'd played at Disney.  While other actresses like Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, & Miley Cyrus in the years that followed would be in the "good girl gone bad" mold for the Mouse House, Funicello was the original.  According to legend, Disney was so worried about his (still under contract) star losing her wholesome image with Beach Party that he insisted that she not bare her naval in the movie...which of course she did as Dolores in this iconic 1960's picture.

(Spoilers Ahead) The movie does have a plot, if you can believe it.  The film follows Frankie (Avalon) and Dolores (Funicello) as they are going to a cabin by the beach.  They are not engaged, but Frankie assumes that a horny Dolores will finally put out for him if he gets her alone...which is exactly why Dolores has invited all of their friends to the cabin.  She doesn't want to go all the way until Frankie says "I love you" and the two breakup as a result, with him ending up with the buxom blonde Ava (Six), while Dolores becomes besotted with Professor Sutwell (Cummings), an anthropologist who is observing the beach party culture and comparing it to African cultures he's studied in previous lines.  All the while, Marianne (Malone), his associate, is clearly in love with him and also wants to know if he's horny for all of these beautiful bikini-clad women or not, and there's a biker gang, led by Eric von Zipper (Lembeck) who are constantly trying to wreck the gang's fun.  In the end, both Professor Sutwell & Marianne, as well as Frankie & Dolores, end up in each other's arms and falling in love just in time for one last musical number.  Even Vincent Price shows up in a totally bizarre cameo.

The Beach Party movies are not rocket science (despite having Cummings play a scientist in the lead, which is a nice touch).  But I was quite surprised that they're actually incredibly fun, and not just in the "it was fun" concession prize sort of way we see people talk about modern blockbusters-the first Beach Party movie is a blast.  It helps that Frankie Avalon is unfathomably sexy in this movie.  With toned abs, flawless hair, and a wonderful voice, he embraces his short king status with a flare, being swoon-worthy in every scene (if he had planned a weekend with me at a cabin, no one would've gotten invited to come with, I can tell you that...Annette has more willpower than I do).

But honestly everyone is good in this.  Funicello is not a great actress, but she also doesn't need to be-she takes on this part really well, and has you rooting for her the whole time.  Dorothy Malone is hilarious as the jaded (and decidedly not-virginal) woman who is attempting to seduce an oblivious Bob Cummings, landing every one of her punchlines.  Cummings might be the only fault here, as at some point I want to see him acknowledge the hormonal reality of this movie (everyone is jiggling, twisting, and getting all worked up).  But the film is weirdly both wholesome and sexy at the same time-a hard-to-juggle combination that Disney would end up perfecting years later with their cavalcade of sweaty, shirtless Chris's in the MCU.  Suffice it to say, the next Beach Party movie was immediately added to my Letterboxd Watchlist after this, though we'll end our look at Funicello next week with a different genre of movie that she made famous in the 1960's.