One note before I commence. I am aware that so far during this I have been very blessed. To my knowledge, I have had no one in my life who has had the coronavirus, and (knock on wood), certainly no one that has had an issue with it being a serious health issue for them. I have (again, knock on wood) so far been very lucky to not have any change in my employment status other than where I'm working, and have not had to endure the economic uncertainty that others have had to do. This article is more me talking through how I'm feeling and what I've been doing with the past 7 weeks-any complaining is, trust me, done in perspective, and I hope everyone out there continues to be healthy and financially safe, and if they are not, are able to access the medical and fiduciary help they need.
The first two weeks of quarantining were, for me, by-far the hardest. I am someone who has issues with anxiety and depression, and quickly those both skyrocketed as I adjusted to staying at home, not knowing how to handle work (I rarely don't go to the office), and convincing older relatives that they needed to stay home as well. I was confused about where to take advice, with the CDC, WHO, and Trump frequently contradicting themselves (Trump was quickly lifted out of the equation, and for all practical purposes, Tim Walz is my president until November), and I was a bit scared & lonely. I live alone, and I have not had an in-person conversation with another human being in 41 days that lasted longer than a minute (and that was only with a guy I'd never met who came and thatched my lawn). There were a lot of red flags those first two weeks, and I was scared of whether or not I was going to make it through this.
But once the anxiety & lack of structure disappeared, I...was fine. In fact, I'm probably better prepared for this than most people, based on conversations I've had. I am a Type A, deeply organized, list-making introvert who has primarily indoor hobbies, the ability to work from home, and is really good at stockpiling for these exact sort of situations, both food & activities. People are always shocked when I say I'm an introvert because one-on-one I tend to be gregarious, to the point where I sometimes question why I score SO hard on the introverted scale in personality tests...but this event confirmed it. I have been able to keep an ongoing internal conversation with myself that other people might have struggled with.
For starters, I have not been bored once in the past 42 days. I spend most of my free time at home. 95% of the time I spend outside of my home is at my job, and so once I got adjusted to working from home & getting into a cadence that felt like it made sense to me, that was most of the hurdle for me. We'll get to things I miss in a second, but generally I've been handling this well. I'm not someone that has felt the need to break social distancing, not even once did it go beyond the "it'd be fun to do X" in my head to actually considering doing it, and I've stuck hardcore to the stringent guidelines outlined by medical professionals & virologists.
So what have I been up to? For starters, I've been seeing a lot of movies. I decided on maybe Week 2, when I had a bit of a panic attack and spent an entire Sunday comfort-watching Disney+ that there needed to be a balance between comfort/familiarity and still accomplishing something. I did not want to come out of this time, "down time in my house" that I am always begging for, without having something to show for it, but I also didn't want to push myself to the point where I would continue having anxiety issues throughout the entire run of this social distancing, which would be particularly unhealthy if this lasted for 3+ months (as it likely will).
So movies became mostly new. I've been working on the OVP (particularly watching films from 2004-2019, as I want to get all of those years viewed and maybe even their ballots written by the end of quarantine), the Summer Saturdays with the Stars actresses' movies (I had written all of the articles through mid-May at the start of this, and I'm now halfway through July), and getting movies off of my DVR. One of the biggest ways that I've kept sane here is that I'm a list-maker. I have a list of at least 2200 movies I want to see before I die, and this actually got me considerably more organized about getting such a gigantic task undertaken, and understanding how many of those movies are ones I already own, I've recorded, or are on one of the four streaming platforms I subscribe to (Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, and Criterion). If you're someone who has been feeling bored, I'd suggest doing something similar-go through all of the movies, not just the highlighted ones on something like Disney+ & Criterion and add anything of interest at all, and then just work your way through. You'll have accomplished something, and not just re-watched Friends or Parks and Recreation for the 60th time. My brother-in-law did a cool thing where he crowd-sourced which TV show he hasn't seen he should watch next, and that might make it even more fun (it's also a way to understand which of your friends are watching or have watched the same thing as you, and you can then text about the show without revealing spoilers!).
While I did the same thing for books (if I have a hoarding problem, it's definitely in regard to buying books that I don't always get around to reading, and thus basically my library is a solid place to shop for titles to read, which I've been doing throughout this quarantine & will continue to do). I made a list of things I wanted to do around the house, cleaning projects & yard projects & work projects & computer projects & blog projects, all things I can do if/when I am feeling adrift. Again-even if you're not a list person, I suggest this if you're feeling restless. If you don't use the list, you're fine. At least you have it for days where you're feeling anxious or might want to break self-quarantine. Suffice it to say, I could probably do this for a year and not complete everything on these lists, so I am not bored.
The one place where I decided not to do a list, at least so far, was television. I am not a big TV person, but the TV shows I like I genuinely love, and especially during those first two weeks, TV was how I survived. So while I did watch Schitt's Creek for the first time and finished off Salt Fat Acid Heat, I've by-and-large been watching TV shows I've already seen before, or at least new episodes of shows I've watched for years. Bob's Burgers and Lost have been the headliners alongside Schitt's Creek, and it's a nice balance against movies, which sometimes have the pressure of trying to understand or a lack of familiarity (plus, they oftentimes come with a review I have to write). The TV is mindless, routine, and safe-it's not how I'm spending most of this time (like I said, I don't want to waste it), but it's the background noise of a lot of my downtime.
That said, I obviously miss things. I miss my family a lot. My parents visit frequently, and would have been here three times in the past 7 weeks, and I was planning a trip to my brother's that would have happened this past Thursday & Friday. It's not the same not seeing my friends everyday at work; I don't have a lot of close friends, maybe 6-7 that I talk to with some regularity, and I miss them. I am not great with setting up things like Skype calls & texting regularly, but I've been trying really hard to do that every time I get a text, in hopes of avoiding too much loneliness. I've also sent letters, gifts, and cards to some family & friends, and seriously-you should do this too. Everyone loves getting mail right now, and the post office needs our love. Send a letter to a random aunt or uncle or grandparent or parent-they'll adore it, and you'll be helping finance an institution we'll need for November's elections.
I also miss some places. Even though I'm a homebody, there are a few places I go out regularly. I desperately miss movie theaters. Oh, what I wouldn't give to go to a movie theater. The first "let's take a risk" indulgence when I feel ready after this is going to be going to a movie theater and just buying a ticket to...I don't even care. I want it to be a new movie because I want to support the industry, but other than that-I'll even see a sequel to a movie I hated the original. I just want to sit in a movie theater again.
I miss live theater too. I had tickets to three shows I've missed already, and all three were ones I was looking forward to (and at least one of which has been permanently cancelled). I'm not discussing industry or problems outside my purview right now, but I hope that live theater can recover soon after this. I miss walking through bookstores and my weekly trips to the library; after this, I'm just going to spend a whole day buying books in local bookstores. Literally all day long.
And I miss the gym. If I've learned a lot of good things about myself, I've also learned some bad. I'm never going to naturally be a tidy person (he said, looking at the dining room table that has basically just become an extension of the kitchen counter). While I have the ability to meal prep, without having easy access to fresh produce, I'm not great a extended periods of eating well. Like I said above, I have hypochondria pretty bad and do currently have the capacity to buy more than one week of groceries at a time, so I've been to the store maybe three times in the past 7 weeks? And my meal planning isn't great. But mostly, I miss the gym-that is where I go to exercise, and with me already doing my job at this house, it's hard to also convert it into another locale, one of the few times I left my house before this.
That said, I've added a few things into my routine. I've gotten WAY more organized about movies & getting films watched. Not only through streaming, but also TCM and my DVD Netflix subscription (you should get this if you're bored by movie selections on streaming-it's by-far the most expansive selection, it's cheap, and again, you're helping the postal service). I broke down after 40 million advertisements and got MasterClass (currently halfway through the Alice Waters one, and yes, it is fascinating). And I've taken up some new hobbies. I'm almost done with my second Shutterfly book, am teaching myself how to cook new dishes (do yourself a favor and subscribe to Shay Spence on Instagram if you haven't-he's a quarantine necessity for newly-aspiring chefs...also, he's dreamy), and am now going to finally attempt some puzzles that were collecting dust in my game closet.
I've also, admittedly, learned things about the collective internet and the people I follow on social media (many people, as happens on social media, I either don't know or haven't seen in years).
First off, y'all need hobbies. I am staggered, especially some people (not all-this is not subtweeting all), by how quickly some people got bored into this thing. Like, it's time to start shopping for some books at your local bookstore (they need the help!) and stop claiming that the reason you're not reading or writing your novel or making a podcast is because "you don't have the time." You literally can't leave the house-you're no longer allowed to ever say when someone does something awesome "I'd do that too if I had the time"-that excuse has officially been deleted from all of our vocabularies.
Also...I have an unpopular opinion. All of the people who are complaining about wanting to go out are not really helping to decrease the number of people who are not self-isolating. It's one thing to complain about, say a concert that you can't go to, but the guys who are complaining about not doing hookups on Gay Twitter or sending out old photos of you at parties & on vacations...how is that helping the rest of us want to stay inside? I feel like we need to think before we do things like this (a lesson I also know I need to occasionally heed), but I think it's more beneficial to be talking about the fun ideas you have in isolation (I know I've picked up a few from friends, including the PigeonGames app which is super fun), rather than advertising all of the things we wish we were doing.
I'll be honest-I'm going to in general be one of the last people to break self-quarantine, because I understand the two-week window, and the fact that I'll want to avoid the inevitable second wave of this. This doesn't just include the idiocy happening in places like Georgia and Tennessee right now. It also includes the people on Instagram right now who have started breaking...and yes, we can tell you're breaking. If you magically are out hanging out with a dozen different people that you don't live with, you're basically part of the problem. If you're close enough together to take a selfie together, you're not really self-quarantining, even if you're outdoors. We're still in the flattening the curve stage, and while I totally understand the economic pressure to reopen businesses, even if it might be a health risk, my sympathies do not extend to game nights and posing on a morning hike.
In terms of next for me-I am certainly going to carry forward some of these habits. The meal planning is now a thing that will stay, as will being better about not wasting food. I love early-morning shopping, which will surely continue in the future, and my organization with movies & reading I've gotten to the point where it's sustainable after my real life resumes. I will continue to do cooking adventures, and hopefully puzzles, and I'm definitely sticking to writing down my budget, as well as limiting how often I eat out (that's going to be a treat rather than a crutch).
The big thing I can't figure out personally right now is travel. I had planned a trip in June and a separate one in September-I think they're both off of the table (June for sure, September about to be). I sort of made a pledge to myself that I'd get at least one item off my Bucket List that's travel-related every year until the bucket list was done (or I was). I don't know how that'll work this year-I might do a road trip down to Iowa to get a presidential library done, but honestly-that's a big unknown right now. When does tourism start to emerge? When is it safe to go to a hotel again? I'm playing that by ear, but it's the biggest unknown for me personally.
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